Missing Your Freedom?

Often, we surrender freedom willingly. When you realize that you miss your freedom, take action! Ultimately, freedom is a choice. YOU have the power to choose.

We all are – to a varying degree – captives. Our captivity may have different reasons: it could be circumstances, health, money, people, etc. Most commonly however, we are the captive AND the captor.

Often times, we are the builders of our cages and willing captives. Once we realize that our freedom is in danger, it’s up to us to demolish the cage and step out of it.

It happened to me and I was surprised by my conclusion. I found myself chocking in my living space. I blamed life and my people. After some consideration however, I realized that neither life nor my people arranged – or even influenced – my living space. Intentionally or not, I am the one who made the space unlivable.

Yes, I was unhappy, maybe even angry. But eventually I realized that I’m the culprit and the person responsible for making my space livable. Eventually, I made the necessary changes and my suffering stopped.

True, the above example may seem trivial. Still, the discomfort drove me crazy. Don’t mistake unhappiness, discomfort or frustration for a normal way of being. It isn’t. Take a closer look at your life.

What causes YOU to feel miserable?
HEALTH
MONEY
CIRCUMSTANCES
PEOPLE
SOMETHING ELSE

Of course, not every problem can be “fixed” or completely fixed, but most are. Ask yourself whether – or to what degree – you’re in control of the situation? What you can do to improve or change it? How are YOU contributing to your misery?

HEALTH: How healthy is your diet and lifestyle? Are you physically active? Do you get enough sleep? Do you have some habit that makes you feel worse? Eating healthy, moving, getting enough sleep and / or gradually eliminating bad habits will help you feel better.

MONEY: Is the problem lack of income / low income, poor money management or too high bills? What can – or should be – changed? Living with financial stress is destructive. Finding ways to either improve your income or lower expenses will alleviate the stress.

CIRCUMSTANCES: No one’s circumstances are set in stone. There is a reason our circumstances came about in the first place. At some point we consented to them. As life goes on and we – and sometimes, relationships – evolve, the circumstances that have been acceptable in the past may become unbearable. Instead of complaining and feeling like a victim, ask yourself what can – or should be – changed. Perhaps a radical change isn’t feasible. Maybe you need to precede gradually, but there is always something that YOU can do to change circumstances that aggravate you.

PEOPLE: Well, let’s be honest. We and our relationships change over time. Surround yourself with people that inspire and support you, today. Eliminate relationships that drag you down, or at the very least, limit the amount of time you spend with people that make you feel lousy.

SOMETHING ELSE: Life as it is, has many facets. I have no way of knowing what makes you unhappy. I’m sure however that sitting with feelings of unhappiness doesn’t cure the blues while taking action restores us.

No matter how it feels right now, YOU have power, abilities, savvy and a social circle. You can moderate your circumstances and events that have negative effect on you. There are things you can do. There are people and places to contact to ask for – and get – help. Whether you can solve your problem by yourself or with outside help, you’ll feel better when you see welcome changes taking place.

In the end, frustration and anger – or sadness – aren’t “just” feelings. If you allow them to simmer long enough, they’ll negatively affect your health. High blood pressure, anxiety, depression, etc. are only the tip of the iceberg.

Unhappiness and discomfort are not normal states of being. In most cases, there is something that can be done to improve – or outright, change – the situation that makes us unhappy.

Ultimately, staying captive to an unpleasant situation is a choice. You can make yourself comfortable as a victim and complain about it OR take action and leave discomfort behind you.

 

Photo by Julia Solonina on Unsplash